Thursday, February 23, 2006

Morning

Grange park was beautiful this morning. Everything was tinted with silver, an effect of the sun shining through a sheer haze.

Glorious.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Ass-tired

...that's pretty much how I feel right now. But, in a strange way, I feel ok about it.....I am ok with being ass-tired.

Why?

Well, I've had a very fulfilling week thus far and the reason that I'm exhausted is because I've been working my tail off at work and getting loads of stuff done. That's pretty much it. Doesn't take much to make me happy :)

This evening has been pretty good so far, actually. Because I was so tired, I called Karl before I left the office and asked him to meet me at Fujiyama for dinner....that place is fantastic and going there for a meal after a hard day's work is sort of a tradition that Karl and I are developing.

And, I bought a bottle of white wine before returning home after dinner so I'm going to open that up once I finish this post.

This thought occurred to me today, life doesn't have to be easy to be good. In fact, I kind of like the challenges that come my way......no challenges = boredom for me.

Now, I'm really tired and I can't type anymore....

Monday, February 20, 2006

Teardrop

My Father said that she was “as close to him as a teardrop.”

The imagery is exquisite without any intention.

As close as the tear in my eye. Closer than the tear on my cheek is He to me.

Monday, February 13, 2006

My weekend....

There are lots and lots of details that I want to write about from this past weekend....or at least it seems like a lot of details...so I'm just going to write in point form to get it all out......

Friday (this wasn't an eventful day, but it was the start of the weekend):
- I worked from home 'cause I was sick
- I also took lots of naps in between emailing and writing
- I felt kind of sulky from being home all day
- J got home from work and then went out with friends from Newmarket
- Fel came over and we went out to Fujiyama for dinner...mmmm.....Fuji....
- Fel and I talked "girl talk" until about 12:30am and then she went home
- I put myself to bed 'cause I was still feeling sick
- J got home from being out and we chatted
- I went to sleep and slept really well!

Saturday (definitely an eventful day):
- Good bits and frustrating bits
Good:
- Baking cookies with Sharon
- Walking and talking with Sharon to Rachel's place
- Cookie exchange and more girl time with Lisa N., Rachel, Sharon and Fel (she arrived towards the end of the exchange)
- Hanging out with Luke, Andrew, Sharon and J at Luke and Andrew's place
- Seeing Aviel......oh Avvy!
- Walking home from Luke and Andrew's place after watching The Power of One (I highly recommend this movie!!)
- Praying while walking and eventually working out all that was frustrating (listed below for the record)
Frustrating:
- As I mentioned above, I did manage to work through all of these frustrations, but I still want to write them down as a reminder to myself of what I was feeling and how I dealt with it
- Still sick, but had stuff to do
- Being misunderstood despite having the best of intentions
- Watching The Power of One which is a great movie, but very very very emotional and not good when one is feeling fragile already
- Being frustrated with self for feeling frustrated and angry for even remotely being concerned with self
- Feeling like I should be able to understand God's will and simultaneously feeling like the understanding of His will is constantly elluding me

Sunday (crazy eventful day....amazing....wonderful!)
- Still sick, but incapable of immobility
- Got up early to go to The Meeting House with Sharon
- Morning was clear, bright and crisp....the perfect winter day in the city!
- Mood was considerably better than previous day
- Really felt God's presence and peace surrounding me
- Met Sharon at the Paramount (for The Meeting House) and we met Nick inside the theatre
- Immediately noticed that there were many "notice-worthy" young men around (instant smile)
- Saw two old friends (Andrew and Kristina) walk in the door with a new friend (Dave, Sherri's boyfriend) and nearly fell off my seat!
- Felt very vulnerable and a little nervous 'cause I wasn't sure if A&K would be happy to see me or not
- Had a really great time of worship (we sang "How Great Thou Art"...one of my favourite old hymns)
- Saw Craig, Jill's old BF!
- Saw Dan (Luke and Andrew's roommate)
- Sermon was pretty good...had a couple of epiphanies and moments of clarity
- After the service, got to talk to Dave, Andrew and Kristina....turns out it was a fantastic reunion and I was overjoyed to see them and they were really excited to see me....I think we're going to stay in touch 'cause they live downtown, too
- Saw Dan.....talking to Vicki!!!!!!!!!! Vicki is my friend Jill's cousin and I've known Vicki since high school
- Got Vicki's attention and she got all excited and we had one of those huggy, giggly girly moments :D
- Told Vicki I saw her talking to Dan.....and....she said....Dan's her cousin! Weird. And, cool :)
- Talked to Dan briefly...mentioned I had been visiting at his place the previous night with L&A
- Went for brunch with Nick and Sharon....SO FUN!
- Realized that the whole day had been a bit of a risk-taking day up until that point and I had done things that I normally wouldn't do....things out of my comfort zone....immediatly praised God silently for such an awe-filled day
- Wandered down Queen with N&S....found the new Billabong store....found my wedding dress there! Now, I just need my husband :) I know he's out there somewhere :)
- Arrived at FT feeling very alive, refreshed and invigorated
- Helped with set up
- Made decision to go to Germany with Rachel!!!!!!!!!
- Got cookies and lunch for Rachel from Subway
- Greeted with Sharon...again, really fun!
- Worship at FT = highlight of my week
- Teaching at FT = nourishment of my week
- Figured out what I want as my tattoo!!!
- Got to talk to all my favourite people
- helped with tear down
- went to "dirty bird" for post service snack with Rachel and Fel
- Went to Luke and Andrew's to meet a bunch of people who were hanging out there
- Met Daniel, friend of Heather, who is from Bangladesh...he speaks Bengali!!!
- Walked home with J...had a good talk.....my best friend is the best person in the whole world. If you didn't know, now you do.
- Realized still feeling sick
- Feeling sick, but not the least bit tired
- J watched a movie while I slept
- J turned movie off ('cause it was a terrible movie) and I woke up
- Had a really bad time trying to fall asleep again
- Couldn't breathe well through the night...congested....coughing....eyes burning

Monday (extension of weekend):
- Woke up feeling like ass so called in sick
- Really worried 'cause I didn't want Debbie to worry about anything...didn't have laptop 'cause I had dropped it off at the office on Sunday (so I wouldn't have to lug it in this morning...bright idea)
- Ended up with Debbie being very gracious and understanding (I have THE most amazing boss in the world. The world!)
- People I had meetings with were also really nice
- Called Chuck (yes, in Malawi) to say happy birthday...ended up talking for half an hour!!!
- J got up and made me french toast stuffed with fried bananas (God bless him)
- I slept and slept and slept today, off and on
- Watched the tail end of a really great Meg Ryan movie (don't know the title)
- J went out for a bit
- Booked flight to Germany with Rachel!!
- Got emails from Karl
- Sat down to type this blog
- Feeling a little better....not coughing as much, but still sneezing...feeling hot and achey still....eyes still burning :P BUT, can't miss work again so will have to suck it up even if I'm not feeling better by tomorrow....it's ok though, not 'cause I'm strong, but because my Father is

Friday, February 10, 2006

My fours...

Lisa "tagged" me and I now have to list four things in response to the topics below...

Four jobs I've had:
1. Piano teacher
2. French teacher at a day care
3. Teller at a bank
4. Communications Consultant

Four movies I could watch over and over again:
1. Moulin Rouge
2. Kingdom of Heaven
3. Office Space
4. Jeux d'enfants

Four tv shows I love to watch:
1. CSI: Miami
2. Boston Legal
3. Without a trace
4. Sex and the city

Four songs/albums I can't hear too often:
1. Mirrorball - Sarah McLachlan
2. Now at last - Feist
3. The district sleeps alone tonight - The Postal Service
4. I am a rock - Simon and Garfunkel

Four places I've lived:
1. Scarborough, ON
2. Whitby, ON
3. Kingston, ON
4. Toronto, ON

Four places I've been on vacation:
1. France - Paris (x2), Pau, Marseille, Aix, Nice
2. India - Bangalore, Delhi, Calcutta (x2)
3. London, England
4. Pyrenees, Spain (not sure what the little town was called)

Four websites I visit daily:
1. FNet
2. gmail
3. SLF Intranet
4. umm...blogger? (I don't really "surf" the Internet)

Four of my favourite foods:
1. Cake with really good butter sugar icing
2. Gnocchi with pesto
3. Chinese buns
4. Momos

Four places I'd rather be right now:
1. With friends
2. At a corn beef restaurant
3. At any restaurant (I just realized I'm really hungry)
4. On the living room sofa....I'm in my room right now...

So, there you have it...my fours....

My friend Rachel...

...is hilarious. I hadn't checked out her blog in a few days and I just found myself laughing really loudly, reading her more recent posts. Oh Rachel, dear...you're awesome :)

Somehow you just managed to sweeten my very sour mood...

It's been a week...

...a busy, tiring week...and, my body finally caved in and gave in to the cold that it had been fighting for two weeks. Yesterday, I couldn't swallow or talk...it sucked.

I also didn't feel motivated to write...and I realized that I wasn't writing...then I felt guilty... :P

I think I wasn't motivated to write because I wasn't having a stellar week and I didn't really know where to start...the frustrations I was feeling weren't anything monumental, but it was the accumulation of a bunch of little things that was getting to me.

I don't really know if I'm feeling better right now, per se, but I figured I should write something. Writing usually makes me feel better, but I sometimes have to force myself to start.

Fel is coming over later to hang out...that's something to look forward to :) I should also get something to eat, but I don't feel like eating...

Bye for now...

Monday, February 06, 2006

In light of eternity....

...everything around me seems to be so insignificant.

And yet, I know that I have to live in the here and now; to serve where I'm called to serve and support who I'm called to support.

It's a really difficult balance and I don't really have it down...

Friday, February 03, 2006

Rachel is the hottest chick ever.

She updated my sidebar to include people's blogs. I love her. I don't know what I'd do without her. She's the best friend a girl could ever have.

And she wrote this whole post herself.

Underwater my feet don't stink

If any of you ever watched "Bobby's world" as a kid, there was a rousing episode, marked by the quasi-merengue-styled song "Underwater the fish don't stink." If fish don't stink underwater, then I'm sure my feet wouldn't either....unfortunately, they're not underwater right now.

Nuff said.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

I really love meatball subs right now....

I don't know why, but every day this week I've had a craving for a 6-inch, meatball sub, on whole wheat, with extra cheese, from Subway. I just finished eating one for my brunch.

I'm feeling very quiet today. Kind of contemplative. Very much content. I have no meetings which is a blessing and I have lots of desk work to keep me occupied. It's only mid-morning and I've been really productive....I love that feeling :)

I think I want to go for a long walk tonight. Just me in the city. I kind of wish there was a beach closer to me....I would love to be close to water.